I will write this next blog on meditation – and celebration. When sober. Because it is daunting to be newly sober. You feel terrified of being rejected and yet you go around rejecting people. Know the feeling yet? It’s your first sober Christmas and all you want to do is either run and hide or just get drunk. Now!
Grin and bear it, honey, you are sober now and us sober tribe do it differently. Take a chance on mediation. And celebration. See if they can indeed go hand in hand? The best part of being sober over Christmas is that you are now no longer alone. There are more people choosing sobriety and as the trend takes off, so too does the relinquishing of the sobriety stigma.
The media is so quick to brand a non-drinker as weird or boring. Sure, we may be weird and boring but that is because we are in tune with our inner needs. We don’t need to go out and mingle in drinking holes, making a huge noise but saying nothing at all. Many drinkers, as we well know, are hiding their true natures behind a wall of defense and false gaiety,
First Sober Christmases need Meditation
If this is your first sober Christmas, however, it is not going to be that easy. I recommend lots of meditation to enhance your inner and outer celebrations. When you are forced to mingle at a party with an alcohol-free drink and everyone else is sipping simply the best pink champagnes and whiskeys, you can fall back on the new you, strengthened by meditations. Mediation falls into the tools you need to grab as you navigate a dry festive season.
Make sobriety your big vision – Gayle of Sober Bliss says that meditation is her number one tool to staying sober. She says that meditation is a tool to transform the mind. And that is what ex-addicts of all levels really need – a brain transformation!
“Meditation practice and techniques can improve and develop concentration, clarity, enhance emotional positivity, and bring about a deep sense of calm and appreciation for the true nature of things.”
Be ever grateful about everything – practicing gratitude is a known tool to make recovery a success. Write a gratitude list every day: just write bullet points down about what makes you grateful today: my cat purring, my toothpaste color, the sun shining in my mirror, my kind children, the neighbor’s smile, etc. Do it! Include feelings and places, memories, and things that impacted you.
“Cultivate the habit of being grateful for every good thing that comes to you, and to give thanks continuously. And because all things have contributed to your advancement, you should include all things in your gratitude“ -Ralph Waldo Emerson
Remember Self-care and Your Own Needs
Self-care is about enhancing self-esteem and we all know that when we drank, most of us lacked self-esteem. I think it is a disease of modern society. So when you take time to establish your own routine that includes enough daily time for you, you start to realise that your life needs a healthy happy you. Some simple steps in health and self-care include making sure you have a daily wash (bath or shower), clean the house, eat well and mostly greens and wholesome foods that are not processed, eat regularly and moderately, wear fresh clean and attractive clothing, have interesting hobbies and interests, do exercise daily, play music, read great books and watch great movies. Remember that connection is the opposite of addiction to get together with friends and family when you need to, chat on Zoom to your tribe and others who are far from you. Reach out to those less fortunate than you too.
Take heed of triggers – your family and friends! Too much food and too much of everything! Meditation to music or a guided podcast can help you to overcome triggers that stimulate negative emotions in you. When feeling triggered, go and sit in a quiet place and just be with those feelings. Maybe you will get closer to the source of all your triggers as you sit with them when they occur.
Festive occasions are triggers for many of us who have stopped drinking. Meditate before going out and make sure you leave the social do when you have had enough. It is your right and if anyone criticizes you tell them to sock it.
A great mediation yoga is Kundalini yoga and Holly Whitaker of Hip Sobriety notes that this form of yoga has been her life saver through her sobriety.…” meditation is the foundation of not only my sobriety, but my success in life. I’ve used it consistently now for over two years, missing a handful of days since starting, and the changes it has engendered are profound. It’s helped me find my center, helped me tone down and control my reactiveness, rebuilt the part of my brain that was affected by alcohol and pot and food addiction, given me control over my negative mind, pulled me out of depression again and again, allowed me to connect to that greater thing outside of me (or inside of me – however you want to look at it), and more than anything, become the number one coping mechanism in my life – for stress, anxiety, anger, blues, bitchiness – it fixes everything.”
Look at these guided meditations for you this holiday:
Kundalini chant: https://www.glo.com/class/2679
Shift – https://www.the-shiftapp.com/
Calm – https://www.calm.com/
Sober Bliss: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6_2HQvX1AbE
Calm Radio: https://calmradio.com/en/
Great Meditation: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sJH6_ZbgeWQ
Best of all, chat to one of our Tribe Sober coaches when you need a chat and find someone in our groups who can be your buddy.